I’m cheating. I should have written a post last 15 Mar 2017. But here I am writing about this post on 17 Mar 2017. What the fuck have I done?
I should have been very disciplined. I lost control of myself again. I need to be able to consistently do the things I said I will do. Fuck. It’s just fifty something words so far that I have written. I need at least 300 words. Fuck. I cannot have an orgasm during a work day. I will definitely get sick if I do that. I’ve done it before. A lot of times. Made me sick. So sick. I don’t do that anymore. I still have orgasms. But it’s only during my rest days. After having an orgasm I cannot do anything productive anymore. I feel extremely tired. I just wanna lie down on my mattress on the floor and binge watch on YouTube videos. Or read a lot of articles or books. Or fall asleep. Okay. One hundred fifty something words already. Pork chop. Filet mignon. Pikachu. Motherfucker. Tomato. Potato. Doggy style. Dogs barking. Dogs are barking outside. I saw a very beautiful woman near my apartment a couple of days ago. But I didn’t do anything. Because during that time I was on my way to refill my water container with fresh drinking water. Water is more important than getting to know that pretty girl buying ice cream. Fuck. I don’t know. I don’t know what to do with my life anymore. Read. Write. Experience life. Experience sadness. Experience tiredness. Experience insomnia. Dealing with shitty customers. Dealing with nice customers. Fuck. Hamburger. Fried chicken. Rice. White rice. Brown rice. Pizza. Pizza Hut. Yellow Cab Pizza. Papa John’s Pizza. Shakey’s. Tomato paste. Potato paste?! What the hell. What the fucking hell. Life is too hard. Life is too short. Life is life. Death is death. Meow. Meow. Meow. 1995. 1998. 1988. Yes!